Ford to Prevent Being Found on Road Dead

While generally accepted that driving a Ford* is a less than ideal activity, it’s clear that dying beneath one is marginally worse. Thankfully the bozos at the Blue Oval are looking to prevent such ignominy with the advancement of their Pedestrian Detection system.

2018 mustang 2

Already available in cars, this safety feature will see upgrades to the 2018 Mustang and F-150, adding night vision to the list of safety features. A radar added to the bumper couple with a windshield-mounted camera distinguish people from other objects (trees, Trump supporters) and provide both audio and visual alerts to the driver. If that fails, the car will intervene with collision avoidance and steer the car away (and hopefully toward the aforementioned Trump supporter.)

Recognizing  that 75% of road deaths occur at night, Ford addressed their unique vulnerability: the dark is pretty much the only place that their products look good. It’s hoped that this will allow victims of being hit by a car can at least die in the comfort of knowing they weren’t hit by a Ford.


* No citation needed.


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